The Great Oil Spill of 2009

It isn't often that the media doesn't report a story. It is usually a sign of a cover-up or that the general population has little interest in the subject. But when it is a subject of oil pollution, they are usually on board. The story you are about to read is completely true. The details are being reported accurately. Some of the details may be too upsetting for those with queasy stomachs.

The story begins in a small suburb in Illinois just miles off the coastline of Lake Michigan. I became privy to the story by being present for the event from beginning to end, although I was not presently aware that the drama was unfolding. I ventured out to take Baby J to the doctor in Gurnee, IL for his routine 15-month well visit. As usual, the doctor reviewed his development and general health. We left with a good report.

We left the facility at approximately 9:30 am and ventured naively into our day. A friend would be meeting us shortly for some shopping, but there was still time to drive the short distance across the tollway to the Starbucks for a coffee. My senses were delighted and I felt suddenly awake and more coherent as I slowly sipped the Caramel Macchiato.

We arrived at Target at 10:11 am. We were a bit late, but still excited to begin shopping with our dear friend Heather. Very little happened and we did not find what we had been anticipating. We left the store promptly at 10:50 am and drove to the TJMaxx at Entry J of Gurnee Mills Shopping Center. There were very few crowds, as the shopping day had barely begun. We perused the racks and found exactly what we anticipated. We even found a fleece dinosaur hat for Baby J during these frigid months.

The time was approximately noon. We settled into a table in the Food Courte. Heather and Baby J waited patiently as I rallied together a meal for the little guy and myself. Then Heather hunted for her next meal. We calmly ate, enjoying the company and the small talk. On the way out, Baby J noticed that the corridor we were leaving through was lined with mirrors. We stopped to let him play with his reflection, still not knowing what was about to happen. As I picked up my beautiful Saffron Roll Boxy Backpack by Petunia Pickle Bottom gifted by my dearest friend and adopted sister, the chaos began.

Dripping from it was a lemon-scented substance. I presumed that it was some cleaning product that had been used in the Food Courte. And, when we arrived home, I thought, What can I do about it right now? What's done is done. So, I laid down for a nap with Baby J and neglected the clean-up. The rest of the day was business as usual and the bag was left to marinate.

The next morning, Baby J and I woke early. I gathered the diaper bag and began emptying it only to find an empty bottle of lemon-flavored cod liver oil. Oops! This cannot be good!!

I deserted the entire contents of the bag into the washing machine. Five times it was washed, each time with a different concoction. Insanity, I thought, is doing the same thing over and over again and hoping for different results. The results, sadly, remained the same. Cod liver oil and the lemon scent wafted throughout the house. It was too late. The bag and its contents were destroyed. It now rests in peace in the shallow grave of our garbage can.

It was a beautiful bag, but only a possession. It is just sad that it had to become the damaged mediator between myself and the cod liver oil. Lesson learned.